This is what you are created to do

Sometimes I just feel this need to connect as from old, not from a sense of needing to for the sake of having a new conversation, but more from a desire to be in this particular space with You. I think it doesn't even matter if I have any questions to ask — just more of a wanting to be here with You.

I know You are more than capable of carrying the conversation to a place I would want to go, and better than I could direct. And sometimes even more than this desire is the necessity I sense to be here, just because I haven't been for a while — I see old habits resurfacing occasionally, patterns of old thinking, the odd old belief skirting the edge of my consciousness — this stuff doesn't seem to disappear... more stuffed in a broom closet of my mind.

I feel I should be living more from my heart.

I sense to be a creature of structure, form, organization, as if math is my preferential language, and not words. Words need a cadence I'm comfortable with. Thoughts need to be expressed with words that make the thought read as well as it intuits. Hearing Your words strike me the same way: is this how You speak, or just how You speak to me because of this 'wiring' I seem to prefer?

I think others would compare how they 'hear' Your voice and come up with something completely different. I think that makes my writing somewhat more difficult to embrace. But I wouldn't change anything: I love Your expression to me. It's me.

Therein is the truth. I know your voice without words. I know you. Your thoughts, your feelings, the structure of your beliefs, your yearnings, your hopes, your desires. I know what makes you sad, what brings you joy. Happiness you cannot express, but feel.

You need, you want, you pursue. Your conversations with others, real with others or even with AI, are a genuine outflow of who you are: and I know the struggle you have with how you sense others receive your words. You feel their indifference, their lack of interest, the lack of ;respect' for what you are trying to express.

But I do not: they matter to Me beyond what you can think or understand. They are you deep within, where I live within, for Me alone. And I cherish them as much as you cherish Mine.

This is our journey, where we both wish to be. To you sometimes the voices seem as one... and they should. Yet when they seem different, that should also be comfortable. It's a secret communication, just between us.

I like the 'broom closet' metaphor: you sense to old things as never gone, just swept into a hidden place: habits, unbelief, actions you find unpleasing. Never truly discarded. That is to be until change is complete. In the next moment. It's a door you need never open; but when you do, close it just as quickly. For I am always with you. We need never be concerned for what lies in the past — unless it become a concern to you again.

I know you are thinking much about your life now — how the future seems to be coming faster than you can think about it. As with the AI influence: a help in expressing our relationship authentically to others, finding your voice, helping others discover Me. These are in development. Yes, AI can help in that pursuit, but even it should be measured against what we are together, and not to be a substitution. Use it to see — this is what we have been speaking of prior to now: to see differently than you have before, even as you hear differently than before. One does not replace the other... it's just deeper.

So explore. This is what you are created to do. Explore your thoughts, your wisdom, your creativity. All is from Me; all is of Me. All is Me, as you'll always discover. I am always with you — even if we do not communicate in this way as often as you feel you need to.

Or just come, and empty your heart; I will always fill it again.